Brain Sex: Love Without Conditions
Time for a little honesty: This morning I woke up & Googled “How do you know if you’re falling love?” (Hint #1: Googling this phrase!) Later, I turned on MTV–yes, I still watch religiously–& saw the first few minutes of the documentary about Drake, “Better Than Good Enough.” At the very beginning, he talks briefly about his mother & how she is the only person he can truly say loves him unconditionally. That word really sunk in deep for me. ‘Cause really, what does it mean to love someone conditionally? I think it means you love them when they’re hot, when they’re on top, when they’re flyin’ high on the fumes of good times, when they make YOU look good, when they’re introducing you to the “right” people or hanging out at the “right” places or taking the “right” drugs in the “best” clothes.
But to love unconditionally means that you love that person when all that surface stuff is stripped away. It means you love them when they’re down, when they embarrass you horribly in public, when they disagree with you on a subject you’re passionate about, when they smell like they’ve spent the whole day in the blazing hot sunshine (because they have), when they do, say, think or feel something you would NEVER do/say/think/feel…but you still smile.
Unconditional love means you don’t expect them to change.
Instead, you accept them just the way they are.
I realize that I’m falling in love because I am accepting, rather than expecting.
And though it’s strange to suddenly feel nervous, awkward & my heart thumping in my chest around someone I have known my entire life, it also feels liberating.
Because when you realize you’re able to love someone else without conditions, it’s a dead giveaway that you’re also learning to love yourself without them, too.
I think it means you’re growing. Expanding. Big time.
Here’s hoping all of you experience unconditional love,