Despite my best efforts (and believe me, I have MANY efforts), I still have bad days.

I’m an introspective, introverted & otherwise “sensitive” human being. I’m prone to the blues, every now & again.

I recently discovered this super-cool technique for meeting my emotions – and then eradicating them, in one fell swoop. In Tara Brach’s Meditations for Emotional Healing, she presents something called the “YES” meditation.

The “YES” Meditation is 15 minutes of allowing yourself to COMPLETELY feel whatever it is you’re feeling.

Often we don’t realize that we’re pushing negative emotions away. It’s a natural instinct: Nobody wants to feel pain! Instead, it shows up as a nagging feeling that something isn’t right, looming right underneath the surface. And all day we run from it – by incessantly texting on our iPhones, checking Facebook over & over, escaping our homes to meet our gal pals at the bar for a cute umbrella-drink. We do a lot of this, if not ALL of it, subconsciously.

Brach’s meditation encourages us to spend less than half an hour just LISTENING & TUNING INTO our own emotions. And NOT trying to change them, or wish them away.

Brach asks us to SAY YES to whatever we’re experiencing. Anxious? Say, “Yes, this too.” Tired? “Yes, this too.” Going ballistic over an impending deadline? “Yes, this too.” Tender heart stinging over a recent breakup or squabble? “Yes, this too.”

I’ve been trying this every day for about a week now. And the results have been miraculous. (And let me tell ya, being SILENT & STILL for 15 minutes sometimes feels like torture for such a fidgety, always-switched-on person like me.)

When we stop trying to CHANGE what we feel, what we feel CHANGES.

You don’t have to go out & buy Tara’s CD (but I totally recommend it, there’s TONS of other sweet ass meditations & eye-opening stories on it!) in order to experience this little moment of peace yourself. You can either do it intentionally, by setting aside 10-15 minutes everyday to get in touch with your true feelings, or you can try it in the moment – whenever a bad feeling creeps up on you, try to ACCEPT IT & ALLOW it to flow through your body.

That’s the thing about feelings. Just like everything in life, they’re transitory. They’re just energy, and although they hurt like hell in the moment, they too will pass. And if you ALLOW them to do their job – like bring to light the fact that you can’t stay in your semi-abusive relationship a minute longer or force you to face that deeply-embedded old wound that screams “NOBODY cares about you!” – they’ll leave you alone.

But, be warned: When you’re saying “Yes,” it’s not gonna feel good. It’s going to feel really freaking uncomfortable. You’re going to be able to feel it physically in your body. It might tickle, lightly caressing. Or it might STING, like you’ve been jacked right in the tummy.

But then, a funny thing will happen. As you bring down your walls & simply allow the totally raw feelings to settle into your body, everything will soften. And the feeling won’t feel so CRUSHING anymore. It might even dissolve completely.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned in life, is that if I can’t find an answer to whatever is plaguing me, ACCEPTANCE is the true solution to whatever ails me.

I encourage you to stop & take notice next time you feel a gross wave of emotion threatening to pull you under.
I encourage you to LET IT.

…And then LET IT GO.

from my diary: on being human.
i don’t really think it’s about denying the human parts of myself anymore. i think it’s more about finding a balance – expressing the good human parts like sex, happiness, pleasure, while also learning not to dwell or believe too much in the bad human parts like jealousy and fear.

it’s not that we shouldn’t feel those things. we absolutely should feel everything. but i think we should learn to feel those things (however scary, unwelcome and sometimes unfounded they are)…and then to let them go.

xo